seandearth

lightly stepping over the sleepyheads, i make my way through the kitchen. i cook for everyone before they rise, and then stroll along to the beach to have a nice long cold water bath. i hear some loud yelling, they're telling me to come back before everthings finished. smiling at everyone i take my plate and enjoy a late lunch, soaking wet and with my hair covering my eyes. last night was a night to remember, and though it wont come back, i know we will.

no one else sees this, this fear, this same moon that gathers. the tentacles of countless lenses. the fate that brings another day. illusions different for the same twisting eyes, searching endlessly to count the surrounding fish, to embrace sudden asphyxiation. water below my toes, and under the skin, stretching from my arms to my teeth, inaccurate, immense. choking, stripping thoughts of the palpable, of the concrete. obtusely exhaling tears into salty water, and then the improvised last goodbye. if you came to me, i would still drown.

incredible. the answers appear just as long as you loose all faith in them. she tries to reason it out, lighting a fire with her hands, trying to read the stars in a dark drowsy night. he feels her reaching in, ignoring him, confident he will listen. i stare at both of them and they're silence and close my eyes. he takes a needle and starts writing her body, first in the air, now on her back "i do" in blood, and then a kiss. she cries, holds him like a child in her arms, caress his forehead, whispers "i do too". I open my eyes and walk away with a smile and a don't look back.

i just wanna tear up my face. dissapear, forget myself, forget i ever knew me. and then fade in. close my eyes without remembering a name. invent no stories, tell no jokes. just lay in a cold bed trying to fall asleep. thinking if the next day will rain.

it's just your face. Thats what he said when i was crying. And then i lied about what had happened He missed a step and tripped when he was on the floor we tried to speak, but i could not hear a sound. the glowing stars on the sealing made a wink and i fell asleep before i could hear him leave. The minutes that remained from the night, the frightening voices, the scarred trees, the wet floor, and the blessed cigarettes. fire kept me warm as i tried in vain to embrace myself to the sleeping twilight, with a hurting bed trying to fade away.